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The Punchline Summary:

Great battle from Grind Time Northwest, where division president, Illmaculate, took on 9DM.  These two close friends engage is a very personal, aggressive, and close battle.

Illmaculate was solid in his three rounds, with lines like “once Reverse Live got jerked, I haven’t got the judge back since”, “whenever I do something he mirrors all of the expressions”, “Im battling my alter-ego….from an alternate dimension…we’re going in opposite directions”, “you preach violence because you reside in safe distance from it”, “you switch sides and rep whatever region is convenient at the time”, “Id rather get every affliction you ever wished on everyone than ever live for a second as you”, “that baby beat his ass after flip”, “you share (your room) with you girl, plus your parents in the next room”, “I fathered you concept”, “I smile like a proud dad watching his only son that made it…then I turn away from Only One”, “empty threats flip”, “I’m known to kill rappers quick, because Im skilled at this shit, “funny (your album title) pertains more to the fella that made it”, “Imma treat this battle like a questionnaire, Im going to check this square”, “believe I can make my top seed the laughing stock of the league”, “he spits it before he lives it and swears it will happen one day”, “your body language shows that it hit close to home because we both know what im alluding to”, and “that thought never crossed my mind that just shows how highly he thinks of her”.

9DM was pretty astounding in this battle, with bars like “you still sit in the back seat with child protection locks”, “I remember you had $500 to your name and lost it to Conceited”, “this motherfucker has a baby seat on the driver’s side”, “this is the Gremlin I shouldn’t have been feeding past midnight”, “this is the first match you got me in 11 months, and you booked yourself”, “my albums called ‘You’ll Never Be Famous’ and its dedicated to you”, “you’re the one that always battles for money, but never gets paid”, “bitch we ended up in the exact same spot”, “objects on screen are shorter than they appear”, “you’re people are the only ones that can make genocide funny”, “when I make a reservation its a table for two, when we make reservations we make them for you”, “Tootsie pop wrapper”, “next Christmas you’re getting a blanket with small pox”, “give her an abortion with a boat anchor instead of a coat hanger”, “that ‘whole kiss the bride, bitch inside, crimson tide’ shit – that was me”, “I bet Only One can still feel the knife in his back”, “you’ve been losing your phone as much as your battles lately”, “you always get the bitch seat when we have to try to fit in the car”, “when I threw up in your hotel room you cleaned it up like the little bitch that you are”, “when your friends get big headed, stubborn and fake, sometime they deserve to get punched in the face”, “I dont care if you think of rebuttals at the drop of a dime, I run over the thought of your rhyme as soon as it crosses your mind”, “they gave you 3 pillows and that was enough for a bed”, “how does it feel to live life, you’re broke and youre small”, “what do a terrorist and an Indian have in common, both of them aren’t battling Jin”, “Arsenol will have you jumped by the Crips till you’re throwing up blood”, and “yeast infection….if you add another cup of flower you would have a loaf of bread”.

The Punchline Count:

Illmaculate – 23

9DM – 27

The Report:

Each round in this battle seemed to get more and more personal.  Each competitor started off with general jokes in their first rounds, but the second was more personal than the first and third more than the second.  This was especially the case for 9DM, who started with a lot of the graphic lines that he was known for.  By the third round, every line was a line rooted in history-pointed at Illmaculate.  I wish that Illmaculate hadn’t left out as many details as he did, not to know the facts of their history, but because he had such intricate set ups, and the punchlines would have hit harder if he had followed through with the story.

Although we have heard a lot of sadistic punchlines over the many the battles that we have seen 9DM in, I think this battle had a couple of his best.  That “give her an abortion with a boat anchor instead of a coat hanger” line was insane, as well as the “yeast infection….if you add another cup of flower you would have a loaf of bread” bar.

Illmaculate has a way of crafting his lines to take the wind out of the sails of his opponents rounds.  Against The Saurus, he had the “that was me” concept, which was the most memorable part of that battle, and helped him to achieve the win.  In this one, he had the bars about him setting up this battle on purpose and the line “believe I can make my top seed the laughing stock of the league”.  His strength in this one, as well as his other battles, is his ability to come up with such intricate flips on the spot.  They showed that couple of minutes after the battle where he was just spitting his flips to 9D’s third round, and it was impressive to hear such good lines that he was spitting on the spot about the lines that 9D had.

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